Sprinkler fun. Summer '82. // Sisters snuggling. Winter '81.
Growing up, my two sisters and one brother were an integral part of my childhood. Most of my memories from when I was little include at least one, if not all of my siblings. I can't imagine not having had them there to play and fight and cry with over the years. So when Lee and I decided to start our own family there was little debate over whether we would have more than one child. Since both of us grew up with siblings (he has three brothers!) we knew that we wanted the same for our children. And we also knew that by giving Alice a sibling we were sort of taking the pressure off ourselves as parents to be her sole entertainment as having another child is almost like adding a built-in playmate.
Of course all this thought and conversation happened before Alice was born.
So then Alice was born and it was really hard! Really worthwhile. But really hard. Yes, she eventually settled into a schedule and started sleeping through the night but that labor and then those days and weeks (and months!) leading up to that were rough. Countless times I thought to myself Ya. We're only having one kid. I'm not sure I want to do this again. Maybe it's because we were more set in our ways as waited till we were older to have children or maybe I'm just a wuss but in those early days I couldn't imagine having another baby and going through all of that again. As I was lamenting my newborn woes to a friend who only wants one child she said, You know, you already have Alice. Maybe just have one! And then you'd be finished having kids!
I took her message to heart but then things got easier. Alice settled into a routine. She left that googly-eyed newborn stage and developed a personality. And I started to see why people decided to have more kids. It was finally fun! In fact, there was a day when Alice was about six months old when I just all of a sudden wanted another baby. It was like the light went off and the door shut in the room in my brain that held all those memories of sleepless nights and breastfeeding struggles and mushy post-pregnancy abs and my biological clock started to tick-tock again.
So Alice, I'm happy to say you will eventually have a sibling. The when just remains to be seen.
Workouts: Monday - Rest day. Tuesday - Crossfit: A whole lotta jump rope, hand-release push-ups and kettlebell snatches. Wednesday - Derailed by that stomach bug. Thursday - 4 mile run. Easy! Friday - 6 mile run. Hills!
Kristen & Me. Sisters & Best Friends.
Like you, I've oscillated between Lulu needing to have a sibling & me wondering how on earth I'm going to be able to do it all again.
ReplyDeleteWe were having the exact same conversation with friends last night at dinner. Us and another couple were discussing when would be a good time to have another one & we were all super keen to have one soon until another couple started telling us their tale of two kids woe. They have a 2 year old and a 6 month old. The two year old has worked out how to get out of the cot so is in a big kid bed but refuses to go to sleep each night. The 6 month old has normal 6 mth old night wake ups. They worked out that between the two kids on Monday night they were up 50 times during the night. The mum was nearly hospitalised for vertigo Wednesday night from lack of sleep! Both kids have slept through the last two nights though! It's so weird how sometimes nothing you can do will work & the kid will just change their pattern regardless.
After their stories we were all willing to wait a little longer for the second baby. Having said that, there is something to just having another one asap and like your friend mentioned, be done having kids.
I love the pictures of KPT!! You two have such a good relationship... however, I do remember the high school days!! HA!! Before I had any children I wanted tons!... THEN, I had one and thought maybe two would be just fine! Dylan was SO good with us before Adriana, and I am very glad we were able to have her, they have been good friends and enemy's (especially as she gets older). It is hard to tell someone to do something either way, but I do think that having a sibling gives you a greater feeling about family and a special bond... as you know with KPT! ...
ReplyDeleteOkay after that first crazy side comment here is our life. We have two girls. 19 months between them. The oldest moved to her bed a month before her sister came and loved it. She was ready and wanted into her big girl bed. But my now 22 month old little one is no where near ready now. You have to remember every pregnancy, labour and BABY is different. I also think for a lot of parent who had a rough time with their first are more relaxed and easy going in round 2 and don't have such a hard time. Our oldest is usually the easy baby with my little one being more fussy and clingy than her big sister but I can see how much she loves her big sister! She follows her like a puppy.
ReplyDeleteThe best advice I can give you is yes it will be hard for a while (the first 6 weeks especially when the baby wants to nurse non stop) but soon you get into a groove (and it usually happens faster with number 2) and you'll never be able to picture life without them both. So much love that you won't be able to stand it.
And thereis something so wonderful aout when they both want your lap and your cuddling more little babies than your arms can handle
I love these pictures of my two beautiful, smart and talented daughters. Such great memories.
ReplyDeleteWhen your dad and I talked about another baby. At first I said "NO WAY" because, with you, I had been such a basket case for the first couple of months. But I was a bit older and time erases the labor pains, sleepless nights and crazy routines... and thinking about having another child didn't sound so bad after all.
So glad we did! Yes it was hard with Kristen being a premie, arriving almost 7 weeks early. You loved being the big sister and helping mommy and daddy with your new "baby-sister".
It all works out. AND I wouldn't trade any of those wonderful memories. I love you!