Feeling Important.

View from the Nine Zero Hotel. February 2012.

It has officially been a year since I left my career as a nurse to become a stay-at-home mom.  And honestly, it's sort of terrifying to think that it has been an entire year since I used that part of my brain.  The part of my brain that I spent so many years cramming full of medical and nursing knowledge so that I could competently care for very sick people.  And, just like riding a bike, I know that all that knowledge is still in there somewhere... I just hope the cobwebs dust off easily when it's time for me to get back on those two wheels again someday.

One of things I often worried about when I first made the decision to leave my job to be a full-time mom was that I wouldn't feel important.  What I did every day in my role as a nurse left me feeling like I had made a difference and that what I did during my shift mattered to the patients I cared for.  But what I didn't realize was how those feelings would be even greater when caring for my growing daughter.  Because when those innocent little eyes look up at me, I know that what I do during my day with Alice does matter and that, to her, I am the most important person in the world.  Such an awesome (and oftentimes overwhelming!!) feeling.

Of course there are so many things I miss about being a nurse.  And, of course, there are days when I want to scream and pull my hair out after an especially trying day as Mom.  But then I think about this incredible journey that began at 8:03PM on March 22nd, 2012, and I realize that I wouldn't trade it for anything.  

What was the thing you found most surprising (either good or bad) about becoming a mom?  I knew that the love I would feel for Alice was going to be profound... and it is!  But what I didn't expect was how someone I love with every part of me could also drive me completely and totally bonkers!  Oh, Alice.  You do.  You totally do.   

And P.S... a look back at the adorable sign my husband made for our surprise babymoon stay-cation to celebrate my last day of work.

 "Hi, Mom." April 2012.