Friday, December 7, 2012

Peephole madness.


Thursdays must be my new day for personal meltdowns. Last week it was feelings of inadequacy. This week it was feelings of not belonging. Of wanting to give up. I know it stems from talks we've been having about what the next few years hold for us as far as where we'll be living. Boston will most likely be that place for a bit longer. And I am okay with that. Really, I am. But we had tentatively talked about moving back to Utah sooner than that and, after deciding we may need to stay in Boston a bit longer, I felt sort of deflated. I had been living in the When we move back to Utah... world and had sort of checked out of our life here in Boston. I know that this is a great city. It is just so far from family and friends. And, try as I might to make close friends here, it has been a tough go for me. But more on that another day.

Enough of the emotional stuff! How 'bout a funny story? We've lived in our apartment here in Boston for exactly two years. The building was brand new and many of the units were still being finished as we moved in. As we carried boxes past other doors, I noticed that a few apartments had peepholes. Ours did not. So I asked the building manager if we could have one. She said she'd get back to me and then I never heard from her and didn't bother to ask about it again.

Earlier in the week I heard a soft knock on our door and I opened it to find the building repair man standing there with drill in hand. He introduced himself and said he was there to install a peephole. Great! I said. And then this is what happened next...

Me: Come on in. I was just finishing feeding my baby some lunch.
Guy: She's cute! Alright. Now where would you like this peephole? (as he motions to the door)
Me (perplexed!): Um. In the middle?!
Guy: Okay. How high up?
Me: (still perplexed!): Isn't there a standard height for that kind of thing?
Guy: Well, how tall are you? How about right here? (pointing to a spot on the door)
Me: Sure. I guess that works.
(So he grabs a screwdriver and starts using it to measure the distance between the door. You know, to get it centered. I sort of looked at him funny...)
Guy: My tape measure is in the truck so I'm gonna just get it as centered as possible using this screwdriver.
Me: Hmmmm. Okay.

So I go into Alice's room, which is in view of the door, to change her diaper. He's drilling. He's having a hard time getting it through the solid wood. He finally gets it through. And then I hear some pounding as he puts the peephole into place. Was he using a hammer to put it in? Nope. He was using the butt of his drill. Just smashing it against the door and the newly placed peephole. He puts the finishing touches on it and then jokingly says... Whoops! I installed it backwards! Looks like you have a reverse peephole on your hands! You know, like that Seinfeld episode?! Ha. Ha. Ha.

I wanted to tell him that this whole interaction felt like a Seinfeld episode.

So he leaves and I go to the door to test out our new peephole. And it is significantly higher than the spot he pointed to before he started drilling. Like I have to get on my tiptoes to even be able to see out of it! It is five feet and six inches off the ground! Luckily the current occupants of this apartment are tall as I am 5'8" and my husband is 6'5" because if we were any shorter the peephole would be totally useless.

Hopefully the next tenants of this apartment aren't vertically challenged!



  1. hahahahahahah too funny! and i know what you mean about boston and wanting to be back in utah sooner. sometimes i pretend like my hubby will move to jersey (where i'm from) but it's never gonna happen. at least you and hubs have plans to move back there eventually. lucky. i'd give anything to live down the street from my mom :(

  2. That's hilarious! I'm 5' 4" so your peep hole would be useless to me! Even my hubby is only 5' 10"! Good thing you're both tall. Too bad Alice won't be able to use it for a long, long time!

  3. Wow, you guys are tall, I bet Alice is already bigger than little Wyatt :) We are short, but I can tell you that I think most peepholes are high up and I always have to get a chair. I think standard is between 60-68 inches, so your's is pretty reasonable. I would not be happy with anyone making a measurement for center with a screwdriver though- it looks pretty centered but I would be checking right this minute if I were you!

    And it is tough when you get your hopes invested in an idea and then it doesn't pull through. I have a tendency to get way ahead of myself and that sometimes leads to heartache. It will get better, and then before you know it you'll be headed back to Utah!

  4. Thanks Mama Smith... I'll be glad too when our little Boston family can be part of the Utah clan again. I'm getting my hopes up right now.

    Briana has ton of cousins, who, unfortunately didn't get a chance to see her, hubby and Ms Alice during their last visit to Utah. I've always lived within a few miles (40) from my family, which isn't so close that I see them everyday. But sometimes, I don't see them as often as I wish.

    As for the door... what a dingbat. At least it's done and only a little bit of an inconvenience. We have a new back door for our home, I will have to look into getting a peep hole installed. I hear there is a DYI, do-it-yourself kit. Maybe some day soon.

    Miss you "3". Love the picture of little Ms Alice next to that huge door. xoxo Mom

  5. I would be hosed - I am 5'1" :)

    I think one big thing I have learned from military life is you can't wait to feel at home until you "move back"
    Or get somewhere else. You know I totally understand how difficult it is - we are so far from everyone we love. Just keep doing what you seem to do so well - immersing yourself in your surroundings. I know it's sad (I keep saying "when we move back to the states...".

  6. guess what? I'll be moving to boston in September! :)
    woohoo! friends a plenty!

  7. Oh, man! That story is too funny! I would definitely have to get a stool- I'm 5ft 5. But it certainly looks centered!

    I hope you swim out of the funk you feel stuck in. It's no fun, especially around the holidays. I hope all your hopes and plans come through!


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