Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Be here.

Beacon St. December 2011.

As we approach the end of 2012, I've started to think about goals for the coming year.  Things I'd like to do better.  Things I'd like to change altogether.  There is something so rejuvenating about a new year.  Is January 1st any different than December 31st?  Not really.  But that rolling over from one year to the next just makes it feels like a fresh start somehow.     

Reading back on last year's resolutions, I feel like I did pretty well.  And, honestly, a few of last year's may make it on the list again this year.  I believe that, if you tell other people your goals and aspirations, you make yourself accountable to make them happen.  So keep me accountable, you guys.  And, if you are willing to share your resolutions, I'll do the same for you.

Something I'd like to do differently next year has become very apparent to me over the last few weeks and it will definitely be on my list of 2013 resolutions.

I suck at being present.

I spend a lot of time in my head.  Thinking about the past.  Thinking about the future.  Thinking about what others are doing and comparing myself and then feeling badly about something someone else is doing that I am not (it's exhausting even typing that out!).  But what is really bothersome to me about all of this, though, is I sometimes check out when I am interacting with Alice.  Instead of engaging in play with her, I oftentimes peruse Facebook or Instagram or a blog post on my iPhone or iPad.  I know that a little mental vacation is necessary but I've found that I am doing it more often than I'd like.  And I start to feel terrible as Alice whines or reaches her hands towards me because it is obvious that I am not paying attention to her.

I want to lead by example with my daughter.  And someone thumbing away on their mobile device during a conversation (or, in her case, during play time), isn't the example I want to set.  So one of my resolutions for next year will be to stay in the present.  Stop focusing on what others are doing and unfairly comparing it to what I am doing.  Stop reliving the past or focusing on life in the future.  Be here.  And enjoy the very minute of life that I am living.      

See?!  I feel better already.

 Bright lights. Big City. 


  1. I am so guilty of this as well. Looking forward - where will we travel to next? What should I do this weekend, where will we live next?

    I constantly have to remind me that this is my life, right NOW. I have gotten better since I had Nolan - I make sure I tell him out loud I love him, that I stop and sniff his sweet smell, all those things.

    BUT, I multi task and rush and go more than I need to some times and I feel guilty as well. I find myself on FB or the reading email as I feed him dinner and I need to stop. I love technology, but I find it makes us unable to be still and quiet.

  2. I had NO idea how close the new year was until I started seeing posts pop up about resolutions. YIKES. You know, I find myself some days glued to my phone of the computer more than I would like to admit. I've noticed though that it's happening most on days when I haven't had enough rest the night before (don't have enough energy to really give that all that it takes to be a super present mom) or it's after a string of days where I haven't gotten time to really do the things that I like to do that are separate from Craig and Gus. Maybe that's not the case with you but I thought I would share anyways. HAPPY NEW YEAR?!

  3. Ahh comparing myself to others is something I struggle with too. BUT we have to keep in mind that people only portray what they want people to see (for the most part). I have to remind myself that people I think are awesome also have bad days just like the rest of us :) XO

  4. I missed this post when you posted it, just found it now through your resolutions post. I feel the same way. I do need that little 'mental vacation' but I've found myself doing it more & more. I think stemming from when she was smaller & could just lie by herself looking at things on the playmat. But now she's bigger, she's checking to see that I'm watching her. And to be really honest, sometimes I ignore that whine for way too long. I want to carve out times when we do play together & times when she's happy to play on her own & not get distracted by 'just quickly checking X'. Make sure play is quality play.

    Your present looks great, so enjoy your wonderful family & don't compare yourself to others - easier said than done hey?


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